SEATTLE, WA – Happy Monday, Seattle! Get ready to be shocked, because in a recent turn of events, the new Sonic game by SEGA seems to have some game breaking bugs and glitches in pre-release gameplay footage. Gamers have enjoyed the captivating gameplay and storyline of the Sonic the Hedgehog games for decades now, especially in the previous generation of games on Xbox 360 and Playstation 3, so the fact that Sonic Boom: The Rise of Lyric has issues is really giving us the blues! VEAG Intern Greg Morris walked streets of Seattle for ten hours asking people what they thought of this genuinely surprising discovery, and a guy who asked to be referred to as “Jimmy” and insisted that “he is a man,” had this to say:
“This really sucks, dude. I love Sonic games. I have enjoyed the captivating gameplay and storyline of the Sonic the Hedgehog games for decades now, especially in the previous generation of games on Xbox 360 and Playstation 3, so the fact that Sonic Boom: The Rise of Lyric has issues is really giving me the blues! Speaking of blue, I have some pills to take in this McDonald’s bathroom here. Gotta go. You’re looking good, though, Greg, real good. Really fuckin’ good. I am a man, by the way. You said ‘miss’ when you approached me, I just want to clarify that I’m not female. I’m sure it was an honest mistake.”
Will SEGA be able to fix these issues before the holiday season? You can bet that VEAG will keep an eye on it for you, because you’ll be busy hanging out with your stupid family.
Intellectual Always,
VEAG.
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